the joys of weekday grittiness

            I usually look forward to the weekend, especially going to sleep knowing that my night will not end with the sound of the alarm clock, but that I can wake up slowly, whenever, and linger luxuriously in bed. 

            But I am in a very creative period of my life and lots of stuff is happening, and most of it happens during the week.  So, believe it or not, there have been some weekends when I've been looking forward to resuming doing my stuff, to the grittiness of the week.

            Grittiness of weekday life?  By that I mean being deeply engrossed in my work instead of coasting, my weekend modus operandi.  There is great satisfaction in being intensely involved in something that has meaning to me.  Weekend life puts that work on hold, it places me on hold, it makes me pause, it interrupts my creative flow.  Sometimes the truly mundane is what's most meaningful; not the special spa manicure, not the special restaurant meal, not the lingering in bed, but the submersion in work you like doing, the feeling of accomplishment and getting something important done.  Which mundane tasks do you truly enjoy?

             See also an earlier related post Monday, Monday.

quandary of choices

           I have so many different types of tea in my kitchen cabinet, soothing green sencha, earthy green barley popcorn Genmaicha, perfumy black Early Grey and strong basic Irish breakfast, soothing camomile tea, astringent rosehips and hibiscus, herbal bitter orange, and stomach calming fennel tea.  Each tea has a different characteristic, which I drink according to my different moods, some are therapeutic, some are soothing, some have oomph, some have caffeine, some not.  This diversity in teas is wonderful and offers me all these different options.  In general, we welcome choices like these, whether in food and drink, or the way we dress, or about what books we like.

            People, too, are diverse.  So many different beliefs and convictions, so many different talents, so many different physical characteristics, so many different expressions.  Why is it then that we can sometimes feel threatened by the diversity in people?  That we feel intimated by a different physicality, by a different opinion? Why do we feel safe among people who think like us?   We do we have a tendency to judge different opinions?  How about relishing our diversity?  What do you think?

creating community

            I am so fortunate to live in a fantastic town and community.  Traditionally the church used to be the anchor of a town.  In any small European village you can find the town center with its market place by looking for the church steeple.   At church and at the market is where people used to gather and meet. 

            Creating and being part of a community is a much more diverse experience nowadays than meeting at market or church.  My small town offers an amazing number of cultural and community events, many of them free; from concerts and talks to art parades and music festivals, from street fairs and a community garden to carnivals and the drive-in.  Then there is an endless variety of organizations with opportunities for volunteering, an activity that gets you out to meet new townspeople and creates a better and more compassionate community; from school organizations to food pantries, from literacy and homework programs to community dinners and fundraisers, from organizations to improve life in our community in general or the life of a specific group of people  to organizations for specific causes - you can find an organization for just about any cause.

            Social interaction is important.  The first part of my life I spent living in metropolises.  Life there can be exhilarating, full of energy and creativity, with an endless array of choices to get involved.  But it can also be overwhelming and lonely.  It sure takes time and intent to become integrated into the fabric of a community.  I like knowing the farmers I buy my food from, I like knowing the shop owners where I buy my clothes, books, and gifts.  I like running into acquaintances at the Sunday market or a library event or a festival in town.  I feel embedded in the web of relationships that we as a town have created through our activities and offerings.   The more you're part of it the more fun it is; moreover it's healthy for you (see a previous post on that).  Help to create the community you wish to live in - it's truly rewarding. 

why we need stories

            Everyone likes a good story.  We like to be transported away, we like to be entertained.  Time stands still when I get lost in a great novel with a cup of tea by my side.

            But stories can do so much more than entertain us.  They can provide a mirror for something we go through or need, like when we commiserate with the heroine or long to experience what she goes through.  Then the story provides emotional support.  Stories inspire us to muse and ponder and philosophize, perhaps to see things differently, perhaps to stretch our imagination and mind. 

            Another very important aspect of story telling, of creating a narrative, is to knit a culture or events together, creating meaning, making sense.  Not all of us can see a pattern when we are walking through the woods and seeing all those individual trees.  But once someone flies a drone above the trees, or climbs on a tower, so to speak, and sees the whole of it as a forest, sharing that narrative helps all of us to see the bigger picture. 

            Creation stories ground a culture in a narrative base.  Cultural beliefs are a story that informs how people think about something (that mainstream medicine thinks of the body in a mechanical way is a narrative that informs our healing methods; when we change the narrative the healing methods will change, too).  Traditional fairytales teach us about good and bad, and that light always triumphs over darkness.  Without stories things seem random and our human mind needs patterns.  Nature changes all the time and doesn't need patterns, at least not human patters of orderliness.  We do.  We create meaning and context through stories and narrative.

conquering negative thinking

             Are your thoughts helping to build you up, or tear you down?  That's the question Lesley Alderman poses in his recent NY Times article on conquering negative thinking.  You can think yourself into a spiral of negativity and only see gloom and doom.  You can keep moping.  You can believe that everyone is out to get you. But at one point or another it's neither fun for yourself nor the people around you.  Then it's time to pull yourself up by the bootstraps and do something about it.

            When you figure out and formulate what you want, and work towards it, instead of criticizing the present situation or what you currently don't have, you feel more energetic, more invigorated, more satisfied, and more inspired.   That's the beginning of hope.  Fear and anger can also spur an amazing amount of creative energy if put to good use.

            Complacency on the other hand, sitting back and hoping that others will do the work for you, waiting to see what happens, isn't going to get you anywhere. So put out there what you want, imagine it, "be the change you wish to see in the world," and make one small move in that direction today; and another one tomorrow; and the following day.  That is intent.  That is the only way to initiate change.  And it feels good because you make it happen.  You are in charge.

let's dream

           A day late, but never too late for this message.  While Martin Luther King, Jr. was a person of color, his message of love and peace and respect is of course universal and has nothing to do with skin color.  On MLK day we celebrate his courage in the face of adversity, his vision to communicate peacefully in a world fraught with adversity and strife, his vision for harmony and kindness on Earth, and for showing us a better way,  - a dream still, but let's keep dreaming.   

            Let's embrace his message in our own backyard - in our families, among our friends, at work, at school.  When I can see myself in all other fellow men, in any fellow man or woman, when I can see that they all have the same needs for safety, a roof over their head, a good job, healthful food, dignity and respect, as I do, that they all have the same fears I do, and the same need for love and acceptance, skin color is no longer the issue.  When we become peaceful internally we will become peaceful externally.  Let's all remember his dream and make it our's - it's a universal dream.

did you take a big bite?

             Our current perception of time, cut up into segments that start over after each cycle, let's us take stock and reboot to begin fresh.  2016 is winding down with the passing of two big stars, Carrie Fisher and George Michael.  Neither of them was very old.   But a wise soul said to me once not to judge a life by its length but by its meaning.

            Here, then, are two messages to take away as this year wanes.  Take stock and look back.  What significance did this year have for you?  What did you learn?  What did you accomplish?  What influence have you had on those around you?  Did you give?  Did you take?  Have you gained depth?  Compassion?   What were the big moments this year for you personally?  How do they fit into the bigger scheme of the you-theme?  My biggest accomplishment this year was the completion of my book - finally.  It will be out this winter.

            The message that goes hand in hand with the first one is to live big, to live life to its fullest - my mother-in-law called it taking a big bite out of life.  You can't go back and fix things in the past.  But you can shift your mindset right now and make the next moment, and the next day or month or year, significant.  Take a big bite out of life today, and this coming year.  Make it meaningful, for yourself and others, through your actions.

time for Besinnlichkeit

             In German culture, Christmas, and the Advent weeks prior, is a time of Besinnlichkeit, which, like Gemütlichkeit (see earlier blog post on that), is a term that can't quite be translated directly, only approached through approximate synonyms and a description.

            American Christmas is "bright" and "merry," a time for joyful Christmas parties and conviviality.  The Christmas music reflects that - think of Here Comes Santa Claus, or A Holly Jolly Christmas.  German Christmas is reflective in flavor and indicative of the cold, dark time of year when we hibernate and go inward.   The German Christmas spirit also expresses the holiness of the celebration.  Germans get together for Advent coffee with homemade Christmas cookies and Stollen while listening to Christmas music and lighting the candles on their Advent wreaths; they go to Christmas concerts and Christmas markets; and the kids sit together over Christmas crafts (well, maybe no longer, but we did anyway, when we were young).  Many German Christmas songs are hundreds of years old and sound a lot more "churchy," solemn, mystical, and reflective.

            It's good to intersperse our hectic technology-infused lives with times of slowing down.   Besinnlichkeit is a combination of introspection and reflection, of pensiveness and going inward, of centering and grounding, of connecting with the spiritual.    To me, Christmas has always been somewhat mystical, and Besinnlichkeit let's me tap back into that enchanted world of childhood magic. 

special traditions

          Today we celebrate St. Nicholas in my country.  The children set out their shoes, plates, or stockings, depending on which part of Germany they come from, before they go to bed on December 5.  St. Nicholas comes overnight and brings goodies and small presents, which they find in front of their door when they wake up in the morning.  There is even a special St. Nicholas song for the days before he comes.  St. Nicholas is also celebrated in Holland, where the children receive their presents on this day, not on Christmas, as well as in Belgium. 

            Unless you are of Native American heritage, everyone comes from somewhere else here.  We all have shared American holidays and traditions, like Thanksgiving; and then we have our own cultural or ethnic traditions.   That is what makes this country so unique, and all our friends so interesting.  Our children are older now, but they hang on to that sweet tradition.  Our teenage daughter still sets her boots out - because - while our son gets his St. Nicholas package sent to college. 

            What are your special ethnic traditions you don't share with your neighbors?  Be sure to hang on to them.  It gets boring if we all do the same thing.

on the creative impulse

             This is one of the many precious observations I found in Deepak Chopra's recent book The Future of God: 

"Nature exists to show us the full range of life

in its most creative and most destructive forms."

            It is horrible, heart-wrenching, terrible when we witness or experience destruction and suffering.  It hurts emotionally when a friend simply gets lambasted for her opinion.  Chopra's phrase provides a lot of food for thought on offering an explanation for all the hatred, violence, disasters, and simply unpleasant experiences we encounter as we navigate life.  

            However, as I explored in a recent post on adversarial experiences, the bad stuff could be a point of inspiration for what we don't want, and in turn can become an incredible source of creative energy and renewal and impulse.  Imagine all the good stuff you want in your life, that the bad stuff helps you to define.  As in the yin-yang symbol, good and bad, disastrous and joyful, destructive and creative, are two aspects of the same whole, and exist through definition of their opposite. 

            If you don't like being out of a job, if you didn't like the result of the recent election, if you don't like your local politics, if you don't like the idea of killing animals for human consumption, if you don't like drab colors - turn that energy around and create what it is you actually want:  imagine the job you are looking for, vote in every and all elections (not only the presidential one), become active in your local community to improve its quality of life, eat more plant-based foods, and surround yourself with lots of joyful colors. 

            Dwelling on the negative makes you depressed, complaining and whining is not effective.  But turning a negative experience into a jumping point for something new and better is creative and wise.  Just imagine!