After reading the paper this morning I announced that I was going to water all the houseplants. My husband asked,” Do you have to?” To which I replied, ”Did you have to plant the daffodils?” This morning he had rushed out, before the rain began, to plant a row of beautiful, bright and perky mini daffodils by the entrance stairs, daffodils he had bought on a whim last night with the intent to bring some happy springtime color to the still barren garden.

There are the things we have to do, at least kind of (with a tiny bit of wiggle room), like making dinner or doing the laundry. Then there are the sort of things that we can or want or choose to do. Those are the things that add to life in a different way than the practical laundry or dinner making tasks (although it’s nice to have fresh laundry and a home cooked meal, but you probably know what I mean).

We need a healthy balance of have-tos and want-tos. The have-tos are the repetitive routine chores that keep life humming and comfortable and have a sense of urgency to them (lest we choose to end up with dirty bathrooms or empty refrigerators); the want-tos are the things that add meaning and beauty to life and we do them when whimsy strikes, when we feel like doing them, when the mind needs a rest from routine. Doesn’t matter if I color Easter eggs with my daughter today, tomorrow or the day after. Too many have-tos and a lack of want-tos and life becomes dull.

Perhaps the ultimate art is to enjoy the have-tos as much as the want-tos, the Zen of have-tos, when washing the dishes or vacuuming mindfully are as meaningful as planting flowers or coloring Easter eggs.