time to stop

            Although routines are necessary to create a framework and to avoid reinventing our everyday life over and over they can also become drudgery.  That's when it's time to stop.  It's not always that a fancy trip to elsewhere is necessary, which brings its own kind of traveling stress with it. 

            My daughter was off for spring break this week and I let my scheduling reins loose and had some fun.  I slept in, not as late as on week-ends, but later than my usual 5:30AM wake-up call. I worked a few hours less, no yoga this week, did some more cooking (I love trying out new recipes), sat with my daughter for her late breakfast and a chat, and had a few outings with her - some shopping, a community clothing swap, haircuts, a lunch out, a walk around town.  All calm and quiet and relaxed. 

            Yes, if you know me, I did feel a bit guilty (like playing hooky from work).  But then again I felt so free, so privileged to be able to take this time, so content, so much more relaxed.  In our hectic culture time is utter luxury.  Slowing down is worth every minute!

the human touch

            Most of the time I feel a bit guilty when I take care of myself (and call it pampering).  But massages actually accomplish several worthwhile things besides pure indulgence.  For one you get total downtime (your only obligation is to show up, lie on the table, enjoy and think sweet thoughts), you also reconnect with your body, get to enjoy the pleasures of caring human touch, and last but not least knots and tension dissolve under the massage therapist's knowledgeable hands.  Author and physician Christiane Northrup writes "Touch is a basic human need, so meet it shamelessly."  Did you know that gentle touch actually releases the pleasure hormone oxytocin and melts away stress?

            It's easy to make excuses, especially the money kind.  Consider swapping a massage for something you do well through an hour-exchange.  No money spent. What better way to spend 30 or 60 minutes?

are you ready?

         Even though I love winter for many reasons, and even though we didn't have a real one this year, I am spring fevering.  It's the bright colors I am so yearning for.  Winter, with or without snow, is an absence of color in its white/gray/brown expression.  It's dull because nature is asleep.  Now I can't wait to bring color into my life.  I was tempted by the mini daffodils at the supermarket, and with exceptionally warm March temperatures I couldn't resist pulling out some bright clothes.  I feel like stretching and waking up after a yoga savasana.  My senses are yearning for stimulus - in the form of chirping birds, spring peepers and lots of color.

            What do you like most about spring?

love is in the air

                    Coming from Europe, where Valentine's Day is not taken too seriously, I used to find it, well a bit corny.  To illustrate the importance of Valentine's Day in this country in comparison:  In last Sunday's social Q&A in the NY Times Styles section a woman expressed feelings of insecurity and dejectedness because her boyfriend had scheduled some sports competition for Valentine's Day, would have to go to bed early on Saturday night and presumably fall into bed exhausted on Sunday.  What was she to do, all alone on Valentine's Day?

                   Maybe the answer lies somewhere in between buying your loved one a diamond every Valentine's Day and scheduling a sports event when you know this day is important for her, a happy medium between forced commercialism and meaningful relationship affirmation.  Relationships take effort, and expressing and reiterating our appreciation and love for our partner is important, whether the calendar says Valentine's Day or not.  Personally, I think that overpriced and overcrowded restaurants are not the place to go on Valentine's Day.  But celebrations are always great fun, and another excuse for doing something special is wonderful, in whatever way, shape or form you chose to do so.  For the past few years we have organized a red themed family dinner at home, with each family member in charge of preparing one red course.

             What are your plans?

winter whites

Winter white is a soft white, a gentle, almost creamy white.  It is the white of snow glowing in the sunshine, a warm and friendly white.  You can wear winter white, you can decorate with winter white, you can get winter white flowers, and (most of the time) you see winter white when you look out of the window in our latitudes. 

Winter here in the northeast with its whites, dirty whites, browns and grays expresses an absence of vibrant colors.  Not only is winter a time of slowing down in general (see a previous post on hibernation), it also lets the eyes rest from the vivid colors we experience the rest of the year. Winter is a time to reboot your color sense, putting it back into neutral gear.

beautiful things

Life is about experiences and enjoyment, and we all do it differently.

Even though Buddhism says that if we can learn to do away with desires we'll need less stuff and learn to appreciate experiences over material things, I still do like stuff, or rather beautiful things.  As a former interior designer with Libra rising beauty and aesthetics matter a great deal to me and I love surrounding myself with pretty objects.  Target is just a prettier store than Walmart and I mind, and every once in a while I get a stack of Martha Stewart magazines from the library to get my fill of eye candy.

            I appreciate the beauty, essence and craftsmanship of exquisite manmade things - as opposed to nature made things, although I appreciate those too.  Handmade things enhance the vibes of my home. I feel enjoyment when I see them, walk by them, or imagine getting a special item for a special place.  There is the pretty handmade Italian ceramic bowl, or my many cool little orchid pots with the holes that were handmade in Mexico, or this gorgeous turned wood bowl from a local woodworker that I have yet to get.  It's only here on earth that we get to experience stuff, appreciate things, feel them, see them, enjoy their color and texture, use them, once we're back up there we won't.  Enjoy!

let's hibernate a bit

                  Yesterday I was dragging a bit.  When I spoke to my husband he replied that he, too, was tired.  Then my daughter mentioned that she was a bit tired.    We spoke about wintertime, that it's very cold outside, that people usually feel like holing up this time of year.  Many mammals in our latitude go into full hibernation and just sleep the winter away; plants go dormant as well.   We obviously can't do that.  But maybe, just maybe, we can slow down a bit, curl up with a good book and a cup of tea, catch up on some sleep by going to bed earlier and spending more time under the warm and soft covers.  It get's dark so early and it feels so good to be in the warm house.  Soon enough, when the days become longer, we'll burst with energy and a zest for life and action.  But for now it's a good time to enjoy the slower pace of life.  Let's hibernate a bit.

why not indulge?

             I admit that I easily feel guilty when I indulge myself.  Not so much on the food side - I did grow up in a food culture and don't feel particularly guilty about some wine and chocolate here and there.  But when it comes to massages, pedicures, meeting friends for drinks or lunch, an hour of slow yoga in the middle of the day, just treating myself in general, I tend to feel a bit guilty about spending money on "frivolous" things.  But it is the frivolity, that it is unnecessary and special, that makes such occasional treats so worthwhile. 

            Whether it's an hour of reflexology, paint night (one of those wine & art events), or anything else that let's you know how much you appreciate yourself, is good for you.  The pleasure of feeling good about yourself, about feeling pampered and taken care of, is very soothing.  You are totally worth it!

tiring or inspiring?

      Kris Carr, the crazy sexy cancer guru who I heard at last week-end's Hay House I-Can-Do-It conference, proposed a very easy way to tap into your intuition about a situation or an activity or your job you are not sure about.  She suggested to ask yourself whether it tires or inspires you.

            Emotions and feelings are easy and sure indicators on where you stand with things although they are not well understood.  It seems we don't quite now what to do with them.  Wouldn't life be easier if we didn't have any emotions?  Guys used to be raised that way - be tough, don't show your pain, just forget her, there'll be others.  So we tend to ignore our feelings, bury them, or criticize ourselves for having them.  But cell biologist Bruce Lipton assured us during that same conference last week-end that "feelings are a more accurate description of life than thoughts."

            That means that we can use them as indicators, they provide us with valuable information.  Do you love being at your job and doing whatever it is that you do?  Are you challenged, appreciated and energized?  Or do you feel tired and drained at the end of the day wishing for a different way to earn your daily bread?  Does your partner in crime inspire you, lift your spirits, and show his appreciation for who you are?  Or not so much?  Do you love to go to the gym and derive great energy from it?  Or do you dread going to the gym because you do it out of a sense of obligation?   Nancy Levin wrote in one of her poems "...it's a sign of healing to be feeling..."  Feelings are very practical road signs to help you navigate your life.